Thursday, July 19, 2012

{Thursday Thoughts} Breaking up is hard to do

No....not what you think!

As we all get older, do you find you "outgrow" certain people? What worked at age 22 doesn't work at age 32 and maybe it's time to say goodbye?

Here is my question- how do you breakup with a friend?

So here is the big dilemma: do you let a friendship "die on the vine"...meaning longer time between talks. Even longer between visits. Eventually the relationship is reduced to sitting at the kitchen table at Christmas time wondering if that person should be dropped from your card list. It just fades out.


Do you have that awkward talk about why the friendship isn't working out anymore? Mind you- by initiating that talk you will be branded as a mega-bitch.

Well. I've done both. As I get older I want more meaning in my life. I want truer friends. So, I've let friendships die on the vine and I've had "the talk."

So I've been labeled as the mega B occasionally. Ok. So be it.

Aren't we all evolving into better versions of ourselves? I mean, for me, that's the goal. I have things about myself I try to work on everyday.

I know nothing is perfect. But when someone is bringing you down instead of lifting you up- shouldn't that person "go?" (Not like cement shoes people! Just not included in your life!)

Well, I do know one thing. The love I feel for my friends is real. It's palpable. And even though we don't get to see each other as often as I'd like- they are there. Even if I can't see them. They're there.

I heard a quote once - probably on Oprah- and it said "You are responsible for the energy you bring into my life." When I heard it, I thought: Am I a bringing negativity into anyone else's life?

So I conscientiously try to be positive and upbeat. And some days I have to fake it until I make it.

I have to clear out the bad and make more room for good. And I want more good. If that means I have to wear a mega-B label occasionally. Fair trade.

It's better to let go and move on than live with someone in your life who brings you down.

People change. People grow away from each other. Sometimes it's better to "break up" than "put up" with people who don't fit into your life anymore.



  1. I think you put it perfectly. Couldn't have said it better myself.

  2. Well said! Sometimes friendships are only for a short time, some are for a long time, and some are for life. But all teach us things and ultimately make us better. As we get older, our "true" friends make themselves known and for that I'm forever grateful for.